he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
