She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
