and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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