I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
