My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
