EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
