its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
