he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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