Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
We were destined to go to rehab together
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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