my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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