you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
