Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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