I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
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You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
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something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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