Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You have to summon your inner elephant
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
