Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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