i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
