Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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