Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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