Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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