real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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