there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
