"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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