I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
