in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
