If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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