Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
