My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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