Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
