Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize
