similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
