In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
