there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
My vagina just recognized that song.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
50% drunk capacity currently
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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