ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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