i think i have herpe
just one?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
