The maid of honor just puked.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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