You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
