roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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