What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Even my vagina gasped.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
