So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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