question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
