Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
