There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Randomize