How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You pole danced in your parka.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize