john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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