But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He shit in the fireplace
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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