Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
