dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
