and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
