fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
