we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm too high and old for this...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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